Many among us feel out of place when dining thinking how to follow table manners. Admittedly, it is difficult to learn every point of etiquette at once, but here are a few general pointers. Remember, good manners never go out of style.
Steps:
1. Observe your host. What is he or she doing? The whole point of learning table manners is to feel comfortable when dining with others, and the host is a good place to start. If you are the host, don't panic. You can usually get away with observing the guest you feel has the best manners.
2. Emulate your host. Put your napkin in your lap when you see them doing it. Match their rate of eating. (After all, no one wants to have an empty plate when their host is only halfway done with the dish.) If you see them eating finger food with a fork, you must do this also, even if it seems unreasonable. Assume that your host is always right; unless you can definitely tell that they have bad manners, in which case you may follow another guest.
3. Use the appropriate cutlery. If there are many utensils in your place setting and there is more than one course, start on the outside and work your way in. Again, observe your host if you have any doubts.
4. Be polite. Consider every action before you do it, and if you have the slightest doubt as to its rightness, don't do it! You will embarrass yourself and your host. Take small bites; do not chew with your mouth open; do not talk with food in your mouth; and do not place elbows on the table.
Tips:
- As far as wine glasses go, the rounder one is for red wine and the taller one is for white wine.
- If you are chewing gum, dispose of it before you sit down to the meal. Often, there is no place to put it, and sticking it under the table is definitely not good manners.
- Following table manners is more than knowing which fork to use and knowing how to cut up your steak without looking like a Neanderthal; most of it is about your attitude. Even if you slip up in the silverware department, you can make up for it by being polite and graceful in your conversation, which is essential to any well-mannered guest.
- If you make any loud clattering noises or drop a spoon or something, do not call attention to it. Chances are that no one noticed, or even cared.
- When it comes to bread plates, cups, etc., many people wonder which one is theirs when dining at a big table with many other people. Always go for the one on the left.
- Unless you are dining with a very close friend or group of friends, there are certain things you should not discuss while dining. Use your best judgment when it comes to this, and again remember to be polite.
- Taking small bites is very important. If you do not, you could be caught in that rather unpleasant situation in which someone asks you a question just as you are chewing that large mouthful. While this is sometimes unavoidable, you can minimize the time they wait for you to swallow the morsel by taking smaller bites to begin with.
